so i basically have the whole book written out in my head. it's just a matter of getting it down onto paper, which is getting easier and easier as the days go by. it should be, considering i've been meditating on this story for at least a good year and a half. over the past few months, i've managed to put to rest some nagging personal and professional issues that have plagued me for the past year. i think this has allowed me to free up time and thought to finally get this book done. the only real question marks are when will i have it done? (i'm hoping for the end of the year) and which ending will i choose?
endings are tough, because a bad ending can ruin a good story and a strange ending can pervert the whole story. at the same time, you want an ending with some balls. at least i do, especially considering the themes that i will be discussing. the problem is that the ending i have in mind is great, but it borders on foreign art-film type stuff, which usually turns a lot of people off. i have read and seen a lot of stuff lately where the ending would wuss out even though overall it was a good move. i don't want to do that.
that being said, i have three endings in mind, all different variations of each other, but the book will be drastically changed depending on which ending i chose. at this time, my plan is to just write all three endings, and have friends read the book with all three endings and give me feedback, even though most of my friends consider feedback as, "that was good." or maybe I won't release all three endings and I'll just chose the best one and just fuck the audience over. we'll see. it's still a long ways away before i even write them.